i dont like to be controlled. wonder if im just rebellious by nature.
yet i keep getting myself into these silly situations. only to find myself trying to crawl out of those holes in the end. reminded of the decisions i made in the past and stuck to them; only to realise that i didnt need to be put through all that torture after all.
and i find that im putting myself in the same situations... and wondering whether they would pay off. whether the stress is worth it. sometimes, i want to relax. sometimes, i want to push myself. sometimes, i need to wind down; but what ive committed to doesnt let me do so.
i wish i knew perfectly what i wanted. what would be the best for myself. i wish that life could be more clear.
on a lighter note. i emo finish le. XD actually not that i emo alot lah. just occasionally. but God took that occasionally and reduced it to seldom. and on those rare occasions that i look back and hurt, i ask; and God takes it away... but i wasnt truely healed without fasting. christians fast too. haha. it was something i never thought would be good to do; but it was the only thing that i was not doing which was preventing me from being emotionally healed. rar. this is sounding 'religious' liao lah. don get scared lah. haha.
cant believe how fast the week has gone by.
oh you know. today, the mrt was HORRENDOUSLY CROWDED. as always. lolx. grrr. it's things like these which make me contemplate transferring to nyp. which is like, 1 bus ride away from my house. and why do i live in angmokio? well, because my house is right next to lorong chuan mrt. which is on the circle line. which is 20 mins from buona vista mrt on the circle line. which will be up in 2010. yeah. i love my parents for underestimating the amount of years needed for the circle line to be up. haha. cause they thought it would be up by 2006. so people. develop your comprehension skills well. otherwise you'll end up moving into a new house in 2005 and thinking that you can travel around singapore within minutes cause of the circle line. haha. im not being mean to my parents lah. just saying, expect the unexpected. but well, i think the reports on the circle line hv been quite vague. many people hv interpreted it in different ways. that it'll open in 2006, 2008, 2010... lolx. vagueness.
was sad today in the morning. cause i just realised something. that my 'today' newspaper that i suscribed to, comes at 8am in the morning everyday. which is really bad. which means that i cant read it on the mrt everyday to school. yucks. i should have been more thoughtful and called them up to ask what time it would be delivered everyday. sheesh. the stupid things i do. somehow, my brain seems to refuse to operate unless i read the newspaper in the morning.
i should transfer to nyp. right??? lolx. but imagine u tell pple you are from nyp then they say 'isnt that where tammy comes from?' lolx. it's like graduating from middlesex university. hahaha. cause during my previous securing your pc lecture, the lecturer was from middlesex university. then he put that in his introductory lecture slide, and all the guys were laughing about it. and the lecture hall is 90% filled with guys. LOLX. and we know that they are more excited about such stuff than girls are. haha.
