what happens when you think you deserve something because you've earned it; and when you finally think you're gonna get it, then it doesnt come true? think; when you've worked very very very hard for it, and you've put in the most effort you ever could, and you've done everything possible to earn it. then, it falls through. and the guy beside you, who did nothing, was a spendthrift, doesnt even work hard, and he gets it? something like the infairness in sales. but im not directly referring to that. is it fair? what can i do; except wait patiently; knowing that God has a reason why he did that.
this only makes me want to be even more independent. so that i will not have to rely on anyone.
the first time since the year started. i actually went out with my family. but i realised that, i was right in being reclusive. we never, ever had a time when somebody didnt rub off the wrong side of somebody. the price of different generations together at one time.
in the first place, seclusion worked. we each have our own cells we return to once we reach home. but slowly, i managed to open up to my parents. pushed aside whatever grievances i had against them. and they soon became my counsellor on many matters, from cca to academic.
but i guess. i was never meant to share my personal life with them. nor are they able or desire to have a place of advisorship in it. i tried. dont anyone tell me that i did not try hard enough.
the complexities in life never fail to amaze me.
how come im hearing of more and more husbands betraying their wives, by having another woman outside. why cant a man be satisfied by his wife. why do they have the heart to betray them. why are they so much more disloyal than women. and why do we believe them when they speak romantic words. which express their feelings for as long as they feel like 'playing' with that girl. or which last as long as they 'think' they are in 'love'.
what has the definition of love changed to. last time, marriage lasted a lifetime. most marriages would be fortunate to last past 20 years now.
